i stare at the blade

and wonder why

why not

why i should

then i press it to my skin.

and feel this twitch in my hand

i feel my blood running

my heart beats faster and faster

i scrape press harder

then move the blade

i see the comforting red from inside

i start shaking then crying

its not from the pain from the blade

its from the pain from the momories.

now i stare at it.

my mom comes up

i pull on a long sleeve shirt, hide the knife and wipe the tears

she tells me its time for dinner

i say ok

then...

YOU ADD THE ENDING i will later

-beth

i thought you were the one causing the pain.

but really it was me.

i have hurt u so bad.

all i want is for u to forgive me.

to give me one more chance.

please oh please,

give me one more chance.

u mean more to me than u think.

i just want u to know.

i love u.

so please give me one more chance.

this is all i ask.

thanx for reading. i amnot sure what to do so...idk.

-beth

if u had asked me five years ago if i thought i would ever have two guys wanting to go out with me i would have said in my dreams. now i do bu ti don't wnat to be in a relationship. don't that suck. god my life is fucked up.

here are 3 poems

Giving up and saying goodbye

Its time to give up.

To forgetall that happend.

It is you i have lost.

When i say this my heart breaks.

But to get to on with my life i must.

I love you so.

If only you knew how much.

You would never hurt me again.

You saved me.

Now i just have to give up.

Because I can't take this pain anymore.

I hope you look back.

And see the mistake you made.

I could give you all the love you ever wanted

I will never stop loving you.

Never stop thinking about you.

Now I just have to relize.

Your not coming back.

Goodbye my first true love.

Goodbye.

I am sorry

I am sorry.

I misled you.

Nothing can happen between us.

We are in two different places,

In our lives.

Try to understand my heart isn't with you.

You have been great to me.

But i must tell you.

Give up and forget about me.

I am not worth all the pain,

the heartache.

The time.

The money.

Take it to someone who deserves it.

I hope you understand.

I am sorry.

Possibilities

We could have something special.

Just give me time.

To look over the possibilities

Trust me it is something I want.

Just want to make sure.

I don't want to hurt you.

So just let me look over the possibilities.

just tell me what u think wrote them on the way bac from creation thanx

-beth

Hey this is a story i just dug up that i wrote last summer.

I sit in the dark lost and alone, waiting for someone or something this I am not certain of.  I feel the air getting cooler and cooler.  I find myself becoming more and more tired and hopeless. I know that if I fall asleep i will surely diebecause of the cold.  So i continue to force myself to stay awake.  Then I start thinking will anybody miss me, will they even notice i am gone.  This makes me feel even worse.  A long time goes by and i can't feel my leg or fingers and it is getting harder and harder to fight off the fatigue. Suddenly I hear a something move about twenty yards away.  It seems big and i can't move! I try to keep quiet but fear and being cold make my teeth chatter.  It keeps getting closer.  I feel that this is the end for me.  It is right next to me now.  Then i see a bright light.  It's a flashlight.  Someone is here to rescue me!  The person lifts me up and carries me to a a closeby hospital.  I fall asleep.  A couple days later i wake up.  I see a figure sitting close to me holding my hand and suddenly i know who saved me.  It was my first true love.  And he is here to stay.

i cry when i read this story it is something i would love to be true thanx for reading.  i like the story if u don't thats fine just please tell me what u think of it thanx.

-beth

hey i am entering this into a contest tell me what u think

Why did i think u would change?
Everythign in my head is rearanged.
why did i give u a second chance?
and then do that stupid dance.
why did i listen to all your lies?
if only you could see the tears in my eyes.
why did i let you tear me apart?
i gave you my heart!
why must i always forgive you?
i don't have to do everything u want me to.
why can't i just get over you?
i honestly don't know what to do.
why did i think i could trust you?
You better watch out case i dis[ise you.
why did i let you ruin my life?
hey do you know where i can find a knife?
why can't i just say goodbye?
why why why why why?

thanx

-beth